Putin Says “Phwoar!”
“The whole thing was boring until I saw something that definitely perked me up. No I’m not talking about a trade deal with Germany, but a lovely pair of bouncing breasts,” Mr Putin revealed during the...
View ArticleWorld Governments Concede They Do Not Actually Own Anything
“We have come to the conclusion that there are no actual borders or nations. We made the laws up but they mean nothing and no one has the right to say they own a piece of land because it is part of the...
View ArticleRussian Android Fuelled By Vodka
The team’s goal is to help humanity achieve immortality by 2045 using a combination of vodka and interstellar travel to create a Russian universal utopia. “We will be able to achieve immortality by...
View ArticlePutin a Secret American Patriot
“I have a confession to make. I have always been an American patriot. I want you to uphold your right to freedom of speech and the constitution as laid out by your American founding fathers. Unlike...
View ArticleVinnie Jones Working as Anaesthetist in Russia
“They bring ’em in. I look at ’em. Bosh! Done! They’re out!” Jones said about his new job as an anaesthatist. The football hard man, who is more accustomed to squeezing Gazza’s meat and two veg, was...
View ArticleSnowden Could Get Sanctuary On the Moon
In a remarkable admission by Russian billionaire, Volkov Volkovic, Edward Snowden will have his own moon base built so that he can spend the rest of his life relaying little bits of information about...
View ArticleSurprise, Surprise Greece Consorting With Enemy
After giving the European Union the run-around for months over repayment of its 350 Billion euro debt, and attempting to blackmail the EU with threats of turning to Russia, it is no surprise that...
View ArticleExperts: Iraq Welcoming Russians As Saviours Does Not Bode Well For US
“The Iraqi Defence Committee Chairman wants a bigger role for Russia in Iraq than the Americans, and this obviously is an ominous note in the continued U.S. defeat being compounded in the region. Shock...
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Tony Blair: 45 Minutes to Iraq Attack Planned Years Before
When Tony Blair, the former Prime Minister of Britain, entrusted in the care of the country, stood up and proclaimed that Britain was just 45 minutes from attack, he fooled many in parliament into...
View ArticleAll Media: Everything Russian is Bad
“We have a saying in Hartlepool, ‘If you don’t like it, fuck off’ that sums up nothing in particular, but I just had to say it any way,” a man from Hartlepool, England told no one in particular. So,...
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America: Keeping Up With the Russians
The sheer scale of bombing in Syria by the Russians is outstanding. Just in the last few days the Russian sorties have taken out thousands of Jihadist sites, and with talk of landing 150,000 troops to...
View ArticleRussians Eat Turkey Early This Christmas
“We thought we’d give Putin an early Christmas present so we shot down his plane over Turkey. After ten warnings what else is there to do but blow the plane from the sky,” one Turk said munching on a...
View ArticleBankrupt Russia’s Expensive Syrian Blunder
Has Putin bitten off more than he can chew? Here is a man who is Russia’s strong man and he is now bogged down in Syria. How long can he sustain the expensive bombing campaign before his accountant...
View ArticlePicture You Didn’t See at the G20
Tensions were high between Russia’s Putin and Turkey’s Erdogan during the G20 meeting earlier this month, obviously spilling over to jet fighters getting shot down this week. “Putin was sulking in the...
View ArticleSyria: Why Does Cameron Want to Deploy Air Strikes When There’s a Russian...
Since the Russians moved in their anti-aircraft S-400 missiles in Northern Syria, the U.S. and Turkey have halted air strikes. Why is David Cameron even contemplating sending RAF jets to Syria when...
View ArticleUp Your Dardanelles: Let the Russians Use the Straits of Gibraltar
Those dastardly Turks have closed off the Dardanelles and Bosphorus Strait leaving many ships stranded in the Mediterranean and Black Sea. Naturally this news is not being mentioned yet in the MSM....
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NATO: Why the Greeks Are Siding With Russia
During the summer, the Greeks showed their real selves by utilising Russia as a bargaining chip to get more money from the EU. The financially crippled country of Greece is Europe’s beggar, a pan...
View ArticleIt’s War!
Britain is once again at war. Sixty Labour ministers added to the tally during the parliamentary vote, which will make Britons open to attack by Jihadists all over the world. “We are going to see an...
View ArticlePutin Drinks Glass of Polonium Every Day
According to Russian sources, including the president’s personal chamber maid, he drinks a glass of polonium each morning with his breakfast. “I deliver the glass to our Tsar in a lead lined box. He...
View ArticleMerry Christmas From the Tunnels of Syria
Jihadis are writing their Christmas cards from the tunnels of Syria as the skies are full of drones and planes on bombing campaigns. “We set up an impromptu Christmas tree in one of the tunnels, and...
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